Someone Shoot Me Please
It's 8:20 on a Monday night and I'm ready to sleep. There is something fundamentally wrong with that. I should be out getting trashed so that I can arrive in my new classes tomorrow properly hungover and make the correct first impression.
*Sigh*
I feel like such an old lady. Soon I'll be writing about my arthritis and the fantastic new incontinence medication I've found. Mmmmm, incontinence medication... Breakfast of Champions.
Like I said, someone shoot me please. Preferably in the spleen. Repeatedly. And then could you please remove my toenails? And perhaps wax my eyebrows just to make the torture complete.
Thanks.
posted by SuperKate @ 8:20 PM
4 comments
4 Comments:
Whats wrong with toe socks? They are jammed in between your toes and that is not a sensation I particularly enjoy. However, if you enjoy them, by all means, please continue to stick the cloth into the jammy area. On the plus side, I am a gun owner, so if you really don't want that spleen, come on down to Kearney and we can work something out. I will require, however, at least one night of nudity and abject wontoness, with hours of sweaty sex, with periodic pauses for showers and pizza.
Didn't really get around to blogging today, but wanted to say hi and see how you're doing. Hope your days got better, or at least drunker.
Sorry, haven't been getting laid. I'm waiting for you to come visit me and show me everything you have learned and to teach me a few extra tricks so that I can put a smile on your face that will last for a month. Thats my goal.
I didn't know you were teasing me. I thought it was just witty banter. As for my pants, I have a tendancy to take them off when I am home, and since I live alone, I don't get any complaints.
I commend you on your scholarly dilligence. I do, however, think that what you are doing to ease your sexual frustration will make you go blind. Or maybe not. You should tape yourself doing that and post it on the internet for discussion. Not that I would ever advocate activities such as that.
Hope you have a wunderbar night, day, weekend, week, and shower.
Laters.
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