Tim Will Yell At me

I haven't done my cardio this weekend. I have a treadmill in my basement and the gym is literally 5 minutes away from my house. But still. I have not done it.

Weight training, yes. I even taught Chipper a fun new way to strengthen his abs on my living room floor (called "the Plank" and if done correctly will make you burn in ways you didn't think possible). Cardio, no.

So, I'm dreading tomorrow night when I slink into the gym at 7 to meet Tim (personal trainer dude - henceforth referred to as "Tim" or "PTD"). He is bald (shaved head bald, not receding hair bald) and could kick just about anyone's ass, I'm pretty sure. He would make a very good drill sargeant and in my brilliance I have neglected to do my cardio which will make him very pissed off. Or at least that is how he will act. I have no doubt that he does not actually give a damn.

I still have 22 hours to do some cardio. But I probably won't. I mean, I've had the last 4 days and that didn't do me any good.

Perhaps I shall distract him by asking questions about his wife. He loves to talk about her. She's a professional nutritionist and he gets this huge fantastically goofy grin on his face whenever he talks about her. It's really quite adorable. But I pitty their (future) kids. They have no chance of becoming lazy-junk-food-eating-Americans. And that is half the fun of childhood.

Or perhaps I will just launch into travel stories. Oooh, or jokes. The problem with jokes is that I only know one that isn't dirty. Okay, two, but the second is so cheesey that I only bring it out with people I know won't throw things at me. Or make me do things that are painful.

Anyway, I have to go do some homeworkey stuff. I think I have a test tomorrow, too. But it's in an easy class...